Hello, my peeps!
I hope you are well! I present to you a smile. Please pass one on to the next person you see. It's free, takes very little energy, and just may save that person's life.
I am smiling more these days. I am finding that it decreases my anxiety quite a bit. It helps me maintain my new positive attitude. Yes, the neggies (negative thought monsters) still attempt to sneak up and usurp my serenity. They can only accomplish their mission if I grant them access to complete their mission. I AM the captain of My ship and there is no place here any more for the neggies! Sound familiar?
I journalled yesterday about my recognition of the ubiquitous neggies in my writing up til now. I always say or write that I am improving, that I am better. That is my perpetual quest. As if the Me I AM now, here in the present, is not enough. I AM enough. You ARE enough. We ARE beautiful, intelligent, talented, loving, loved, abundant. We ARE capable of thinking for ourselves. Affirm your Self, your Soul!
I thought back to the unmedicated days of deepest blackest depression. My sixteenth year marked my first depressive episode. My writing and my art were dark and moody, inducing my English teacher and my art teacher to inquire if everything was allright. I denied anything was wrong and was quite reactive with my art teacher. I simply wanted to be in another world and figured if I stood resolutely on the railroad tracks that I would arrive in this "grass is greener" world.
Years later my depression was diagnosed as bipolar disorder. My bipolar disorder is primarily hereditary, perhaps some influenced by external influences as well, due to poverty conciousness dogging my heels from childhood. I wrote a lot of dark and volatile words in the past because I so desperately desired to eliminate the abyss, the God-sized hole of cold emptiness I felt.
I write light-filled words now that hopefully inspire. Primarily I write because I simply enjoy writing. It exists as one of my primary artistic media. I am managing my bipolar disorder very well these days with appropriate medication and counseling. I speak of my bipolar disorder because I want to help others comprehend the dis-ease better. I feel that I can share my experiences with others who may not want to discuss their mental well-being issues or who know a family member or friend who has bipolar disorder and don't know what to do. I have also found other individuals are relieved to finally talk with someone who is open about their mental well-being issues.
So, these days I am abundant and I manifest all that is necessary for me to reach my goals. We each have more tools for living an abundant life than we believe we do. We need but research and get outside our comfort zone, recognizing that we must reach out for help. Life the fullest life possible and ride the bumps out. They too shall pass as quickly as the trees going by as you look out the window of a car. Patience and I are getting acquainted again. It's a tenous relationship.
Live abundantly and remember....SMILE!